Do you find yourself getting so angry with people all the time?

It can be frustrating and often you'll feel bad afterwards for having been so out of control with your anger. But, you don't know why you do it or how to control it. So, where to start?

A great place to start when trying to gain control over your temper is figuring out the real feeling behind the emotion. So, the next time you get angry with someone, take a step back and ask yourself, "Why am I so angry?" What's really going on here?

If you answer something like, "I'm so angry because my friend didn't do what I told him to" you're not digging deep enough. The other person is just a trigger for your emotion. They do something and you feel an emotion in response (anger). That's what you need to figure out. It's your reaction that's important, not what the other person actually did. A situation just "is" until you give it meaning. Something happens and you make the decision (whether you're conscious of the decision or not) as to whether it's "good", "bad" or "neutral". And, that decision is often based on an emotional response. So, you just need to figure out why you're choosing the anger as your response.

The reason why you choose anger can be for quite a few different reasons but this is what you need to figure out. You need to know where your anger is really coming from.

Anger can be a tricky emotion because it's often covering up other issues. Anger is used as a sort of mask. It covers up the true feelings like fear, jealousy, frustration, or annoyance. It's a way of dealing with the situation when you haven't processed the real feelings behind it.

There's always something behind anger. Anger doesn't really come by itself. It's always attached to another emotion. In that sense, anger could be thought of as an intermediate emotion. An event happens, the brain doesn't have time (or doesn't want to) to fully process the situation and it needs a reaction, so anger is what's used until there's more time to examine everything in more detail.

To help you figure out what your true emotions might be behind why you're feeling so angry, here are 11 different reasons and emotions that could be happening:

1. Fear

Anger is often caused by fear. Something happens and it scares you in some way. You fear losing control, looking foolish, being in trouble, or maybe even getting hurt. But, your anger is in response to being afraid of something. It's that whole fight or flight concept happening. Anger is the fighting back at what scares you. So, ask yourself if you're really feeling afraid.

2. Powerlessness

There's a great quote which says, "Anger is a chosen response to the feeling of powerlessness. Anger is how we attempt to reassert control over situations that baffle us." So, you may be feeling helpless or like a victim with something and you use anger to try and regain some sort of control in your life.

Something to watch out for this one is that you could be feeling powerless in one situation and it will cause you to react with anger at anyone who upsets you. For example, say you have a health issue and you're feeling frustrated because you can't get in to see the specialist. So, you feel powerless in this situation, probably also a little scared and frustrated. That's the feeling percolating in the back of your mind and you need a way to release that so as soon as someone or something annoys you, all your pent up feelings are vented on that person. They may have absolutely nothing to do with why you're feeling powerless. But, they've become a handy way to release all those negative feelings you've bottled up.

So, if you find yourself over reacting to situations, check and see if you are feeling powerless in a different situation. Again, you're figuring out where your real anger is coming from.

3. Frustration

If you're feeling frustrated with something in your life, you might respond with anger. You're just so frustrated with something that you're annoyed and angry. For example when you're learning something new like a software program. You just want the program to do something and it's so frustrating because you don't know how to get the software to do that. So, you're feeling impatient and you respond by getting angry at the computer or the program.

Or if you're stuck in a traffic jam and you're frustrated because there's nothing you can do. This one can also be caused by fear though. You fear that you're going to be late due to the traffic jam and your imagination starts going wild with all the bad things that are now going to happen (eg. lose your job because you're going to be late or someone is going to be mad at you, etc.) But, the anger starts with feeling frustrated or powerless with the situation. You don't know what to do.

To deal with this one, it can help if you take a step back and just look at the big picture again. What do I want to achieve in this situation? How can I do that? rather than focusing on the obstacle or thing that's frustrating you.

4. Pain From The Past

Often anger is associated with pain from the past. A traumatic experience happened in the past that the person has never really dealt with. Abuse as a child for example or feeling abandoned as a child. In this case, often the anger isn't even associated with the current event the person is experiencing. The person is just so angry at the entire world due to something that happened a long time ago. They hit out at everyone they come into contact with due to the constant pain they have deep inside. Or they feel so hurt that they don't want to let anyone come close to them. They use the anger as a way of protecting themselves from further hurt. Or a situation happens and it reminds them of that event that happened a long time ago and they automatically react with anger.

5. Bad Habit

Sometimes anger comes because it's easier to blame others for problems rather than taking responsibility for your own life or you don't want to come up with a solution yourself. It can feel like the quickest way to solve a problem. You get used to reacting with anger whenever something doesn't go your way and it's become a very bad habit.

It's a bad habit which will be making your life much harder than it needs to be as you'll alienate your family and friends and could also cause you to lose promotions or even your job. Being angry all the time is a terribly draining way to live as well. If it's a habit for you, it's definitely worth taking the time to change it.

6. Feeling Overwhelmed or Exhausted

If you're overly exhausted all the time, you might be just too tired to mentally deal with situations that happen. You don't have the strength to have patience with the situation. This is one you often find with new parents but it can happen to anyone if they're overly tired.

Or you might just have too many things happening at once and it causes overwhelm for you. You're at the limit of what you can handle at the moment. It can feel scary and you might react with anger at the next event that pushes you over your threshold of what you can deal with.

7. Jealousy

You feel jealous about what someone else has or has done. It might remind you that you want that as well or it tells you that you're not following your own dreams. But, instead you get so angry at the person for having something you want when really you need to turn it around and start thinking "That's something I'd like to have in my life too. How do I start to work towards getting that for myself?"

8. Approval Seeking

If someone is looking for validation or approval from others, they might go to incredible lengths to please the other person and when the other person doesn't react the way they want them to, they feel hurt but they respond with anger as a way to deal with those feelings. They don't feel good enough inside or they feel like a failure so they try to get others to tell them how good they are. But, it doesn't work and they end up feeling angry at everyone because they've gone to so much effort and it wasn't appreciated.

The answer to this one is that you need to deal with those feelings of why you don't feel good enough and start to approve of yourself first. Once you approve of yourself, so will others.

9. Hurt

If you feel hurt by someone's actions, a part of you might not want to deal with that emotion so you choose to respond with anger instead.

10. Manipulation

Sometimes people use anger as a way to get others to react in a certain way. For example, they want the other person to do them a favor and if the other person hesitates they get mad so the other person will do what they want. Or they want to gain control over the other person and they know if they get angry the other person will back down. Or they want to make the other person afraid of them. Sometimes people even use it as a way to get out of doing things. Someone asks them to help them with something and they get mad at the other person not only to get out of the current situation but to discourage the other person from ever asking again.

11. Health

Certain medications like antidepressants can cause people to feel irritable or feel uncontrollably angry. If you've just started any new medication and suddenly feel irritable, you should discuss it with your doctor.

Certain deficiencies can also cause anger issues. For example, a deficiency in magnesium  is thought to cause depression and quick tempers according to Dr. Sircus.

This ebook, Prozac - The Ultiimate Deception (opens pdf document) also goes into more detail about how antidepressants and deficiencies in various vitamins can cause uncontrollable rages. This ebook also discusses how even things like aspartame and fluoride can be having an effect on your ability to control your temper.

So, it's important to consider if there may be health issues behind your anger.

Why Am I So Angry Summary

There could be a lot of different things happening behind your anger and that's what you really need to figure out.

Right now, you're probably just reacting on automatic pilot to the various situations that happen to you. Something happens and the first emotion you feel is anger so you just go with it and don't really think about it or choose how you're going to respond. By taking the time to understand where the anger really comes from will be so eye opening for you. You'll learn so much about yourself and you may start to let some things go.

Often when you gain an awareness of why you're reacting the way you are, you no longer respond that way. You've acknowledged the emotion behind it all and you no longer need to react that way. You understand it so you choose a more effective response for yourself. You see that it's not helpful or getting you anywhere by just reacting with the anger, so you'll stop doing that. You'll feel so much more in control of your life and be so much more at peace with yourself.

I bet right now it can be rather scary when you get so angry at people. Like you're not in control, the emotion is. So, that's what you're learning. You're learning to use your emotion as a tool you use rather than letting the emotion control you. It just takes a little practice and soon you're the master of your emotions instead of the other way around.

Start by taking a deeper look at your anger and what it's really telling you. What's really behind the anger? Ask yourself, "Why am I so angry?" It could be one of the most important things you do.

Take good care of yourself.

A Plan for the Final 7 Years

 

President Obama and US Secretary of State John Kerry have set a deadline of April 29, 2014, to reach a peace agreement between Palestinians and Israelis. The two sides are negotiating in secret on a daily basis. If the stated goal is achieved, the final seven years to Armageddon and the second coming of Jesus to the earth will begin very soon!

I cannot say for sure that the final seven years will begin on April 29, 2014, but I can say with absolute certainty that an agreement will soon be signed, which will begin the final seven years. The only question is: Will it happen on April 29th?

Do I believe the final 7 years will begin in 4 months?

As I said before, I can’t say with absolute certainty, but there are many reasons to believe that THE TIME HAS COME! Following are some of them:

1. The prophesied agreement will turn Judea into a Palestinians state. The United Nations voted on November 29, 2012, to recognize a Palestinian state within pre-1967 borders. This is the biblical area of Judea. As a result, Israel is now considered an occupying power in the eyes of the world community. If Israel doesn't come to terms with the Palestinians through negotiations, the Palestinians have already said they will file charges against Israel at the UN. Israel desperately wants to avoid a showdown with the entire world community.
2. When the agreement is signed, the Temple Mount will be placed under a sharing arrangement between Muslims and Jews. This is described in Revelation 11:1-2. A law was introduced in the Israeli Knesset on November 1, 2013, to place the Temple Mount under a sharing arrangement so that both Jews and Muslims can worship there.
3. During the first three and one-half years after the agreement is signed, the Jews will build their temple on the Temple Mount. The Temple Institute in Jerusalem was founded by Rabbi Yisrael Ariel in 1987. The Institute has now recreated all the vessels and utensils that are required for the building of the temple and resumption of temple worship. In 2013 a new Ark of the Covenant was completed and is now on display in the Temple Institute. I was also told by the guide at the Institute that the architectural drawings for the construction of the Third Temple are now complete. EVERYTHING IS READY TO GO!
4. In 2013 Israel’s number one trading partner, the European Union, placed the settlements in Judea-Samaria under economic sanctions. No EU member is supposed to conduct trade with the West Bank settlers or with any Israeli entity that has any ties to the West Bank settlers. Many other countries and organizations are beginning to follow suit. If the peace talks do not succeed, Israel will soon find herself isolated from the world.
5. Palestinian Leader Mahmoud Abbas has said that he will press charges against Israel and her leaders before the International Criminal Court if a peace agreement is not reached by April 29, 2014. This could result in Israeli leaders being placed on trial at The Hague and sentenced to prison by the international tribunal.
6. Last but certainly not least, Israel’s main supporter, the United States of America, is determined that an agreement will be reached at this time. The US is prepared to use all the power at its disposal to see that an agreement is reached. Israel does not want to alienate its main ally.

So do I believe the time for the prophesied final seven years has arrived? I DO! Do I know for certain that it will be done by April 29th? No. But it certainly looks like the time for the fulfillment lies just ahead!

The Plan

If we are on the brink of the final seven years, what should Christians be doing? We should be like a coiled spring ready for the greatest dash to the finish line and the second coming of Jesus! We should be poised for the greatest effort in the history of the world to reach every person on earth with the gospel before it is too late! With God’s help, that’s exactly what Endtime Ministries intends to do.

Here’s our plan:

» Teach the prophecies of the endtime on television in Israel and around the world. This is being done at this present time.
» Purchase property for the Jerusalem Prophecy College in downtown Jerusalem so the people of Israel can know what is coming and what they will soon live through. This too is done. Four thousand square feet was purchased in downtown Jerusalem in September of 2013. The remodeling will be finished by February 1, 2014. Total cost of the property and the remodeling is $1.3 million, which is all paid for, thanks to our Endtime supporters!
» Open the Jerusalem Prophecy College–A prophecy conference was held on November 2, 2013, in downtown Jerusalem. Our subject was “Israel’s Future…According the Bible Prophecy.” There were about 250 in attendance, eighty percent of which were Jewish. We signed up over twenty for the college that night. We have now completed the first six weeks of classes. They are continuing at this time.
» When the prophesied peace agreement is signed, we intend to send an Endtime magazine to every home in Israel, some 2.27 million of them. The magazine will inform the people of Israel that the final seven years just began, what they can expect over the next seven years, and, most importantly, what they should do about it. This magazine will be published in both Hebrew and English so that everyone in Israel will be able to read the critical message. We believe this mailing will awaken the nation of Israel to the urgency of the times.
» When an Endtime magazine is sent to every home in Israel announcing that the final seven years just began, this will inevitably become world news. We expect to be on interviews with CNN, Fox News and all of the major media. This will give us the opportunity to announce to the world that the final seven years just began and to teach the gospel of the kingdom to the whole world. Jesus said in Matthew 24:14, “And this gospel of the kingdom shall be preached in all the world for a witness unto all nations; and then shall the end come.” We believe the prophecy of Jesus will be fulfilled at that time! What a privilege to be involved in what God is doing in the earth! We don’t yet have a quote for the cost of this mailing, but we estimate it to be around $1.8 million dollars. We presently have $489,637.50 that has been given toward this project so far. Thanks to all who have given!
» We plan to convert our daily radio program called “Politics & Religion” to a daily radio/TV program. We have felt like God was leading us to take this step for a long time. We also will be able to have a virtual classroom in our TV studios so that we can teach our prophecy college classes in Jerusalem, whether we can physically be there or not. They will be able to see us, and we will able to see them. We will be able to interact as though we were actually there. This step is going to take considerable investment. We have been leasing our Endtime offices for the last six and one-half years. We hesitated to invest the amount of money that would be necessary for these new ventures in a building that we didn’t own. We only have three and one-half years left on our lease. Now the building has come up for sale. The owner received an offer from another buyer. It looked like we would lose all the money we have invested here and possibly be forced to move. We didn’t believe that it was God’s will for us to move and lose all we have invested in the present location. We have always believed God chose this place to be an Endtime Evangelism Center for the World. The price of the building is $3.9 million dollars. We have taken a step of faith and signed a letter of intent to purchase. One of our wonderful Endtime partners has offered to loan us $3 million dollars toward the purchase. This means we have to raise $900,000 dollars in the next 60 days. Please pray about this! When we send a magazine to every home in Israel and when we announce to the world that the final seven years just began, our phones will ring off the hook! The people of the world will need answers like never before! We want to be broadcasting and televising to the world every day. That makes the need to own this building so urgent!

I took these plans to God in prayer

I talked to God about all these things that I felt he had put in my heart. I said, “God, our donors have given so generously for the college and for the Israel project. I hate to bring all these other things before them. They’ll think we’re just after money.” It seemed that God spoke back to me: “My people love me and they love my cause. If you will explain the vision to them, they will respond.
So at the danger of being misunderstood, I present these critical needs to you. Time is of essence! We will only get one chance to be used of God at these prophetic crossroads. If God has blessed you so that can, please give the best gift possible at this time. If you can’t give, I completely understand. But, I know this…you can pray!

Summarizing the need

We need around $1.3 million to be ready to mail magazines to every home in Israel when the peace agreement is signed. This could be as early as April 29, 2014.
We need $900,000 within sixty days for our down payment on the Endtime building. I really believe God can provide the entire purchase price of $3.9 million so that Endtime Ministries would not be burdened with debt. This would enable us to devote all of our resources and energies to reaching the world in these endtimes.

To all of our supporters

You have been wonderful! If you cannot give at this time, please don’t feel guilty. But if God has blessed you so that you can give, please consider making these needs of highest priority. I don’t believe there has ever been a more important time than right now to make our resources count for the kingdom of God!

To donate to the Israel Project or the purchase of the Endtime Evangelism Center—or to both, simply call 1-866-310-5010. Or you may donate online at the sidebar on the right.

P.S.

Our total need within the next 60 days is $2.2 million. This sounds like a large amount of money, and it is. However, if 4,400 people will donate $500 each, the goal will be met.
For all who contribute $500 or more to either of these projects, Endtime will send, as a gift of appreciation, a copy of the message I gave to the Jewish people in downtown Jerusalem on November 2, 2013. The DVD is, “Israel’s Future…According to Bible Prophecy” and is not for sale.

Did God Die for Our Sins? - FUNNY - Sh. Dr. Shabir Ally Vs Jay Smith

The problem with arguments and debates is that many 'Christians' themselves don't know Christ and they spend so much time arguing for their Christian religion without having a first-hand experience of the living and loving Saviour. One of the greatest tricks of the devil is to get Christians wasting their time in arguing and debating with unbelievers. Unbelievers will not understand Christianity, unless God opens their eyes...It gets nowhere because contemporary debate has been conditioned for people to talk past each other, and then wrongly understand and label it as dialogue. I refuse to enter into such debates..It's really unwise for a Christian Bible scholar to have a debate with a Muslim scholar..Because none will give room for others to surpass, it can only lead them to a discussion involving differing points of view. Certainly, there's nothing to debate about the scriptures. Don't argue with the sons of Ismail, cause we are from Abraham not Ismail.!

TEN STRATEGIES FOR SPIRITUAL RESILIENCE.!

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Beginning this talk by saying thank you is not just an exercise in protocol.  It speaks directly to the theme of this gathering, which is, Spiritual Fitness.  Becoming an appreciative person is a top strategy for spiritual fitness. 

1.   Cultivate an attitude of gratitude.  There is a reason that the phrase “count your blessings” is a watchword.  We are so blessed in so many ways, yet it is human nature to love to complain and to notice what is lacking rather than what is present.  I have this quote in the signature block on my email, from a book called Thank You by Zelig Pliskin- “What could you be grateful for now if you were grateful for something?”  There is always something- make sure the balance in your life is more focused on saying “Thank you” than on saying “Please.” .  I am going to share with you this morning ten strategies for gaining and maintaining spiritual fitness.  Now you know the first one- be grateful.  Number two-

2.  Be happy unless there is a very serious reason not to be.  It is human nature to be dissatisfied and to strive for more and better, and in many areas of our lives this serves us well.  If we are dissatisfied with our work, we will try to improve.  If we are dissatisfied with disease, we will search for cures.  It is critical, however, that we learn to distinguish between what can and what cannot be changed.  We only create misery for ourselves when we allow dissatisfaction over what cannot be changed to become an obstacle to our happiness, and miserable people are not spiritually fit people.

3.    See yourself and others as the image of God.   Jewish Biblical commentators suggest that only one person was created in the Genesis story so that no one can think that he or she is better than others.  Each of us has within ourselves a soul that is given to us as a pure spark of the Divine.  It is spiritually draining to live with the challenge and disappointment that necessarily comes from living with other people.  Chris Cleave put it this way in the book, Little Bee-  “There’s eight million people here pretending the others aren’t getting on their nerves.  I believe it’s called civilization.”  If we can remind ourselves of the essential holiness of each person that we meet, we will become more compassionate and more spiritually fit.  This leads us to #4-

4.    Let it go.  Not everything can or should be an issue.  Anger is antithetical to spiritual well-being.  Righteous indignation is so tempting and so invigorating.  The battle cry of, “But I am right!” is irresistible.  There are things worth fighting for, as individuals, and, as we as Soldiers know, as a nation.  But we will destroy ourselves if we allow ourselves to be consumed by passion.  Rabbi Shlomo Carlebach had to flee Vienna, Austria as a young man.  He grew to be an internationally known singer/songwriter, and was invited to return to his home country.  People were shocked when he said yes.  “Don’t you hate those people?,” they asked.  He replied, “If I had two hearts, I would devote one to hating. But, since I only have one heart, I don’t want to poison my own essential being with hatred.”  Let it go, #4.  And its corollary-

5.   Accept imperfection, your own and that of others.  Forgiveness is, for many of us, the greatest spiritual challenge of our lives.  In The Secret Life of Bees, Sue Monk Kidd writes that “People in general would rather die than forgive.  It’s that hard. If God said in plain language, ‘I’m giving you a choice, forgive or die,’ a lot of people would go ahead and order their coffin.”  If we can’t or won’t forgive, we will die spiritually- it’s that simple.  None of us is perfect, we all require grace and mercy throughout our lives.  A little kindness and understanding is the foundation of our spiritual well-being.  And- we need to forgive ourselves just as much as we forgive others.  Rabbi Harold Kushner says that the four holiest words in the English language are, “I may be wrong.”  Practice saying them.

6.   Pray.  Communication is fundamental in any relationship, and our relationship with God is no different.  We should never be shy about asking for what we want and expressing our needs, whether in the words of a traditional liturgy or in the words of our heart.  Elizabeth Gilbert expresses this so beautifully in her book, Eat, Pray, Love, where she addresses her main character- “Where do you get the idea you aren’t allowed to petition the universe with prayers? You are part of this universe, Liz.  You’re a constituent- you have every entitlement to participate in the actions of the universe, and to let your feelings be known.  So put your opinion out there. Make your case.  Believe me- it will at least be taken into consideration.”  It will at least be taken into consideration, and, as the Jewish sage Moses Maimonides notes, “When you pour out your heart, it feels lighter.” When you’re done praying, think of these words- “Pray as if everything depends on God, act as if everything depends on you.”  Prayer is important, but it does not replace our responsibility to act.

7.   Develop an understanding of good and evil.  The world is full of suffering.  None of us escapes pain and many of us experience deep tragedy.  Whether we are religious or not, we need to find some way of reconciling why bad things happen to good people, some framework that provides a foundation of peace in times of challenge.  The Chinese have an expression, “You cannot prevent the birds of sorrow from flying over your head, but you can prevent them from building nests in your hair.”  Each of us must seek an answer for ourselves that we find cohesive and meaningful.  One way to do this is through #8-

8.   Study spiritual teachings.  We are not the first ones to ask these questions, and we won’t be the last.  Explore the writings of some of the great thinkers who have explored spiritual themes throughout the ages.  Subscribe to a website that provides a daily or weekly devotional.  We don’t have to forge a path on our own.  Wise thinkers have provided guideposts along the way, and we should cultivate the practice of reflection and meditation on their teachings.  Rabbi Louis Finkelstein said, ‘When I pray, I speak to God, when I study, God speaks to me. Open yourself to hearing the voice of God.

9.   Remember the Sabbath day to keep it holy.  Okay, so I borrowed this one from that other famous list of 10 commandments.  But it’s a good one!  God created the world in 6 days and rested on the 7th.  Even God needed a day of rest!  In our incredibly fast-paced, 24/7, hyper-connected world- even more so!  If you’re wondering how you are going to find the time to develop spiritual resilience, remember that time for spiritual reflection and growth is built into the framework of creation itself, if only we would take the notion of Sabbath seriously.  Give yourself this gift- you deserve it!  Finally-

10. Know that you are God’s Public Affairs Officer.  Because you are!  If you claim to be a religious person, people are watching your behavior to see what kind of person your religiosity leads you to be.  If you are a jerk, it really doesn’t reflect well on your commanding officer.  So- be good, do good, let your goodness shine.  As the prophet Micah expressed it, “Love goodness.”  In every moment of your life you have a choice- will the consequences of your next decision, of your next action, bring holiness into the world, or will it desecrate God’s name?  I leave you with this- the choice is in your hands- be a blessing.!

WORDS FROM A FATHER TO A SON ABOUT MARRIAGE.!

1. My son, if you keep spending on a woman and she never asked you if you’re saving or investing, and she keeps enjoying the attention, don’t marry her.

2. My son, a woman could be a good wife to you, some could be a good mother to your children but if you've found a woman like a mother to you, your children and your family, please don’t let her go.

3. My son, don’t confine the position of your wife to the kitchen, where did you get that from? Even in our days, we had farm-lands where they worked every morning . . . that was our office.

4. My son, if I tell you that you’re the head of the house, don’t look at your pocket; look if you will see a smile on your wife’s face.

5. My son, if you want to have a long life, let your wife be in-charge of your salary, it will be difficult for her to spend it when she’s aware of the home needs and bills to pay but if it’s in your care, she will keep you asking even when all has been spent.

6. My son, don’t ever beat your woman, the pain in her body is nothing to be compared to the wound on her heart and that means you may be in trouble living with a wounded woman.

7. My son, now that you’re married, if you live a bachelor kind of life with your wife, you will soon be single again.

8. My son, in our days, we had many wives and many children because of our large farm-lands and many harvests, there are hardly any land for farming anymore, so embrace your woman closely.

9. My son, under the cocoa tree that I did meet your mother could be your eateries and restaurants of nowadays, but remember, the closet thing we did there was to embrace each other.

10. My son, don’t be carried away when you start making more money, instead of spending on those tiny legs that never knew how hard you worked to get it, spend it on that woman that stood by you all along.

11. My son, when I threw little stones or whistled at the window of your mother father’s house, to call her out, it was not for sex, it was because I missed her so much.

12. My son, remember, when you say your wife has changed, there could be something you’ve stopped doing too.

13. My son, your mother, Asake rode the bicycle with me before I bought that tortoise car outside there, any woman that won’t endure with you in your little beginning should not enjoy your riches.

14. My son, don’t compare your wife to any woman, there are ways she’s enduring you too and has she ever compared you to any man?

15. My son, there is this thing you people call feminism, well, if a woman claim to have equal right with you in the house, divide all the bills into two equal parts, take one part and ask her to start paying the other part.

16. My son, I met your mother a virgin and I took more yams to her father, if you don’t meet your wife a virgin, don’t blame her, what I didn’t tell you is that our women had prestige.

17. My son, I didn’t send your sisters to school because I was foolish like many to think a female child won’t extend my family name, please don’t make that mistake, the kind of female achievers I see nowadays has made the male-gender an ordinary tag.

18. My son, your mother have once locked up the cloth I was wearing and almost tore it because she was angry, I did not raise my hand to beat her because of a day like this, so that I can be proud to tell you that I never for once beat your mother.

19. My son, in our days, our women had more of natural beauty, though I wouldn't lie to you, some had minor painting of their appellation mostly on their arms, the ones you people now call tattoo, but don’t forget that they didn't expose any part of their body like your women of nowadays.

20. My son, your mother and I are not interested in what happens in your marriage, try to handle issues without always coming to us.

21. My son, remember I bought your mother’s first sewing machine for her, help your wife achieve her dreams just as you’re pursuing yours.

22. My son, don’t stop taking care of me and your mother, it’s a secret of growing old and having children to take care of you too.

23. My son, pray with your family, there is a tomorrow you don’t know, talk to God that knows everything, everyday. A word is Enough for D Wise.!!

I Will Never Hear The End Of It. I Will Never Escape The Fate Of Prejudice.

I will never hear the end of it. I will never escape the fate of prejudice. I will always face hatred with lack of intelligence. My mind has been raped by the absence of human development. Because I am black; an uneducated nigger. The reason for horrific treatment thoughts so bitter, that they will not sit next to me on a full subway. Am more hated than rain on a school work-filled Monday. It doesn't matter that I appreciate language. It doesn't matter that I don't believe in hatred. It only matters that my pigment is altered from your erroneous standards and assumptions that you're smarter. I am always accused of inevitable stupidity, but I don't retaliate your ignorant inaccuracies. We are shaped by culture and not by color. 

For some, my being black is no better than being a murderer. Oh, yes, I'll steal your belongings; I am always poor and hungry, living in the ghetto of some violent Negro city. I am so sad and desperate and deserving of your pity. It's the 21st century, not the fucking 1950s! And I am a woman, made for the kitchen. To be seen and not heard, my thoughts not to be spoken. United we stand, behind the man, for my words are worthless, you must understand. My hormones make me crazy and not qualified for leadership, I show too much emotion. 

I've got to put on my party dress and accept your prejudice. Since when do my ovaries control my sanity? And how come my breasts cause public calamity? According to you, all men are created equal; except coloreds, gays and women aren't people! Gays. Those vibrant people God told you to hate. That god-awful "choice" that they chose to make. Because I most definitely want to live with world-wide discrimination. I certainly never wish to fall in love and get married. 

No, I don't want children share my love with. Happiness? Why would I want it? I address equality with sarcastic undertone because I shouldn't need to debate this; fairness is not something one earns. I should be born into this country with equal opportunity, freedom to love, and contribute to humanity. Exempt from people too frightened to accept the millions of humans who are not like them. 

When you call me nigger, squint, tyranny, dyke, because you're afraid to understand my way of life, I turn my pity on you. You must live under a rock with nothing to do except bully and torture and kill citizens with views dissimilar to you. Humanity is barbaric, savage, uncivilized, inhuman, boorish, primitive, vulgar, and pugnacious. I am not proud to be a part of this nation. 

I am reduced to a second class citizen. I am not a straight, white man with a wealthy reputation. But I can offer peace and love to anyone who needs it. Even to a sexist, a homophone or a racist. I shall giggle at your idiocy in hopes that you learn something from me. 

You have the right to hate me but you have no right to hurt me. We have freedom of speech and slurs of profanity. But I am above this. I am above detestation. But allow me my sadness and restless frustration.-Lisetanne Scherschel

"I WISH YOU ENOUGH"

Recently, I overheard a mother and daughter in their last moments together at the airport as the daughter's departure had been announced. Standing near the security gate, they hugged and the mother said: I love you and I wish you enough.
The daughter replied, Mom, our life together has been more than enough. Your love is all I ever needed. I wish you enough, too, Mom. They kissed and the daughter left. The mother walked over to the window where I sat. Standing there, I could see she wanted and needed to cry. I tried not to intrude on her privacy but she welcomed me in by asking, Did you ever say good-bye to someone knowing it would be forever? Yes, I have, I replied. Forgive me for asking but why is this a forever good-bye?

I am old and she lives so far away. I have challenges ahead and the reality is the next trip back will be for my funeral, she said. When you were saying good-bye, I heard you say, I wish you enough." May I ask what that means? She began to smile. That's a wish that has been handed down from other generations. My parents used to say it to everyone. She paused a moment and looked up as if trying to remember it in detail and she smiled even more.

When we said 'I wish you enough' we were wanting the other person to have a life filled with just enough good things to sustain them". Then turning toward me, she shared the following, reciting it from memory,

I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright.
I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun more.
I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive.
I wish you enough pain so that the smallest joys in life appear much bigger.
I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.
I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.
I wish you enough hellos to get you through the final good-bye.
She then began to cry and walked away.

They say it takes a minute to find a special person. An hour to appreciate them. A day to love them. And an entire life to forget them. Be Blessed Of Divine Light.

God Keeps On Loving Us At Just Those Times We Think He Should Have Given Up On Us.!

God keeps on loving us at just those times we think he should have given up on us. Like the father in Jesus’ story – the father kept on waiting and watching out for his son to return. He kept on loving him in spite of the hurt that he had caused his father. 

And when the son returned expecting to be treated at best as a servant, the son was amazed as his father tucked his robes under his arm and without shame ran down the road to greet his son and welcome him with open arms. He replaced his son’s dirty clothes that smelt like a pigsty with new clothes and shoes. He gave him a ring to indicate his restoration to the family as a son. The father was so overjoyed at his son’s return that he ordered that a lavish feast be held in his honor.

Now that’s love for you. The father still loved his son even though he didn't deserve that kind of a welcome. The father had never given up on his son, his love had never faltered as he waited looking down the road for just a glimpse of his son. The father didn't even put conditions on his son’s restoration to the family. If you do this or that then you can come home. No, he loved him and welcomed him unconditionally. He was prepared to take the chance. You might say he was prepared to take the gamble and trusted his wayward son even though the son hadn't done anything to prove his genuineness. The father was prepared to take this chance because he loved his son and forgave him.

Then there is the other older son who grizzled that his younger brother had been welcomed back with such enthusiasm. Look how the father loved him! He could do nothing but run down his younger brother down, in fact, he doesn't even regard him as a brother but "that son of yours". His brother hasn't done anything to deserve his father’s love and this magnificent feast. In fact, he deserves to be tossed out for the way he treated his father.!

Mother And Daughter.!!

Mother and daughter relationships are complex because the daughter looks to her mother as a role model of what a woman is. As she grows up and sees other woman who live their lives differently, she chooses between imitating her mother or other significant influences in her life.

 As an adolescent she may come to look down on her mother and think that other woman are much better. Of course she is not a fully grown woman so she does not understand the challenges and choices that her mother faces. It is only when she herself becomes a woman that she can fully appreciate her mother.!

Don't worry about growing up enjoy the life you have. You have plenty of time to get there.!

Forget about what others are doing. Stop looking at where they are and what they have. Nobody is doing better than you because nobody can do better than you. you are walking your own path. Sometimes the reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes circumstances with everyone else public highlight reel. We listen to the noise of the world, instead of ourselves. So stop the comparisons! Ignore the distractions. Listen to your own inner voice. Mind your own business.

Keep your best wishes and your biggest goals close to your heart and dedicate time to them every day. Don’t be scared to walk alone, and don’t be scared to enjoy it. Don’t let anyone’s ignorance, drama, or negativity stop you from being the best you can be. Keep doing what you know in your heart is right, for you. Because when you are focused on meaningful work and at peace within yourself, almost nothing can shake you.

When you are content to simply be yourself, without comparing and competing to impress others, everyone worthwhile will respect you. And even more importantly, you will respect yourself. How are you letting others define you? What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you? Truth be told, no one has the right to judge you. People may have heard your stories, and they may think they know you, but they can’t feel what you are going through; they aren't living YOUR life. So forget what they think and say about you. Focus on how you feel about yourself, and keep walking the path that feels best under your feet.

Those who accept you are your friends. Those who don’t are your teachers. If someone calls you something and it’s true, it’s not your problem because it’s true. If someone calls you something and it’s not true, it’s not your problem because it’s not true. Either way, whatever they call you is not your problem. What other people call you is their problem. What you call yourself, and who you decide to become, is your problem. Unhappiness lies in that gap between what we have now and what we think we need. But the truth is, we don’t need to acquire anything more to be content with what we already have.

We don’t need anyone else permission to be happy. Your life is magnificent not because someone says it is, or because you have acquired something new, but because you choose to see it as such. Don’t let your happiness be held hostage. It is always yours to choose, to live and experience. We have all been hurt by our own decisions and by others, and while the pain of these experiences is normal, sometimes it lingers for too long.

Feelings of resentment urge us to relive the same pain over and over, and we have a hard time letting go. Forgiveness is the remedy. It allows you to focus on the future without combating the past. To understand the infinite potential of everything going forward is to forgive everything already behind you. Without forgiveness, wounds can never be healed and personal growth can never be achieved. It doesn't mean you’re erasing the past, or forgetting what happened. It means you’re letting go of the resentment and pain, and instead choosing to learn from the incident and move on with your life.

So don’t bend, don't water it down, don't try to hide the truth with deception. Don’t edit your own soul according to the fashion of what’s popular. It is better to offer no explanation or excuse than a false one. It takes courage and strength to admit the truth, but it is the only way to truly live. Accept what is, embrace it fully, and live for the possibilities that lie ahead.-Bikonu-Nwabu-Ndolili-Life Na Jeje.!

The density of people in society is so thick that, we forget that life will end one day. & we don't know when that one day will be

One day a teacher asked her students to list the names of the other students in the room on two sheets of paper, leaving a space between each name.then she told them to think of the nicest thing they could say about each of their classmates and write it down.it took the remainder of the class period to finish their assignment, and as the students left the room, each one handed in the papers.

That Saturday, the teacher wrote down the name of each student on a separate sheet of paper, and listed what everyone else had said about that individual. On Monday she gave each student his or her list. Before long, the entire class was smiling. 'Really?' she heard whispered. I never knew that I meant anything to anyone!' and, 'I didn't know others liked me so much,' were most of the comments. No one ever mentioned those papers in class again. She never knew if they discussed them after class or with their parents, but it didn't matter. The exercise had accomplished its purpose.

The students were happy with themselves and one another. That group of students moved on.Several years later, one of the students was killed in Vietnam and his teacher attended the funeral of that special student. She had never seen a serviceman in a military coffin before.

He looked so handsome, so mature.the church was packed with his friends. One by one those who loved him took a last walk by the coffin. The teacher was the last one to bless the coffin. As she stood there, one of the soldiers who acted as pallbearer came up to her. 'Were you Mark's math teacher?' he asked. She nodded: 'yes.' Then he said Mark talked about you a lot.' after the funeral, most of Mark's former classmates went together to a luncheon.

Mark's mother and father were there, obviously waiting to speak with his teacher. We want to show you something,' his father said, taking a wallet out of his pocket 'They found this on Mark when he was killed. We thought you might recognize it.' Opening the billfold, he carefully removed two worn pieces of notebook paper that had obviously been taped, folded and refolded many times. The teacher knew without looking that the papers were the ones on which she had listed all the good things each of Mark's classmates had said about him. thank you so much for doing that,' Mark's mother said. 'As you can see, Mark treasured it.

All of Mark's former classmates started to gather around. Charlie smiled rather sheepishly and said, 'I still have my list. It's in the top drawer of my desk at home.Chuck's wife said, 'Chuck asked me to put his in our wedding album.i have mine too,' Marilyn said. 'It's in my diary.then Vicki, another classmate, reached into her pocketbook, took out her wallet and showed her worn and frazzled list to the group. 'I carry this with me at all times,' Vicki said and without batting an eyelash, she continued: 'I think we all saved our lists' that's when the teacher finally sat down and cried.

She cried for Mark and for all his friends who would never see him again.the density of people in society is so thick that we forget that life will end one day. And we don't know when that one day will be.So please, tell the people you love and care for, that they are special and important. Tell them, before it is too late.!

BELIEVE IN ANGELS, THEN RETURN THE FAVOR.!

Touching story.
 As she stood in front of her 5th grade class on the very first day of school, she told the children an untruth. Like most teachers, she looked at her students and said that she loved them all the same. However, that was impossible, because there in the front row, slumped in his seat, was a little boy named Teddy Stoddard.
 Mrs. Thompson had watched Teddy the year before and noticed that he did not play well with the other children, that his clothes were messy and that he constantly needed a bath. In addition, Teddy could be unpleasant.
 It got to the point where Mrs. Thompson would actually take delight in marking his papers with a broad red pen, making bold X's and then putting a big "F" at the top of his papers.

At the school where Mrs. Thompson taught, she was required to review each child's past records and she put Teddy's off until last. However, when she reviewed his file, she was in for a surprise. Teddy's first grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is a bright child with a ready laugh. He does his work neatly and has good manners... he is a joy to be around.."

His second grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is an excellent student, well liked by his classmates, but he is troubled because his mother has a terminal illness and life at home must be a struggle." His third grade teacher wrote, "His mother's death has been hard on him. He tries to do his best, but his father doesn't show much interest and his home life will soon affect him if some steps aren't taken."

Teddy's fourth grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is withdrawn and doesn't show much interest in school. He doesn't have many friends and he sometimes sleeps in class." By now, Mrs. Thompson realized the problem and she was ashamed of herself. She felt even worse when her students brought her Christmas presents, wrapped in beautiful ribbons and bright paper, except for Teddy's. His present was clumsily wrapped in the heavy, brown paper That he got from a grocery bag Mrs.

Thompson took pains to open it in the middle of the other presents. Some of the children started to laugh when she found a rhinestone bracelet with some of the stones missing, and a bottle that was one-quarter full of perfume.. But she stifled the children's laughter when she exclaimed how pretty the bracelet was, putting it on, and dabbing some of the perfume on her wrist. Teddy Stoddard stayed after school that day just long enough to say, "Mrs. Thompson, today you smelled just like my Mom used to." After the children left, she cried for at least an hour.

On that very day, she quit teaching reading, writing and arithmetic. Instead, she began to teach children. Mrs. Thompson paid particular attention to Teddy. As she worked with him, his mind seemed to come alive. The more she encouraged him, the faster he responded. By the end of the year, Teddy had become one of the smartest children in the class and, despite her lie that she would love all the children the same, Teddy became one of her "teacher's pets.."

A year later, she found a note under her door, from Teddy, telling* her that she was still the best teacher he ever had in his whole life. Six years went by before she got another note from Teddy. He then wrote that he had finished high school, third in his class, and she was still the best teacher he ever had in life. Four years after that, she got another letter, saying that while things had been tough at times, he'd stayed in school, had stuck with it, and would soon graduate from college with the highest of honors. He assured Mrs. Thompson that she was still the best and favorite teacher he had ever had in his whole life.

Then four more years passed and yet another letter came. This time he explained that after he got his bachelor's degree, he decided to go a little further. The letter explained that she was still the best and favorite teacher he ever had. But now his name was a little longer.... The letter was signed, Theodore F. Stoddard, MD.

The story does not end there. You see, there was yet another letter that spring. Teddy said he had met this girl and was going to be married. He explained that his father had died a couple of years ago and he was wondering if Mrs. Thompson might agree to sit at the wedding in the place that was usually reserved for the mother of the groom.

Of course, Mrs. Thompson did. And guess what? She wore that bracelet, the one with several rhinestones missing. Moreover, she made sure she was wearing the perfume that Teddy remembered his mother wearing on their last Christmas together. They hugged each other, and Dr. Stoddard whispered in Mrs. Thompson's ear, "Thank you Mrs. Thompson for* believing in me. Thank you so much for making me feel important and showing me that I could make a difference."

Mrs. Thompson, with tears in her eyes, whispered back. She said, "Teddy, you have it all wrong. You were the one who taught me that I could make a difference. I didn't know how to teach until I met you." (For you that don't know, Teddy Stoddard is the Dr. at Iowa Methodist Hospital in Des Moines that has the Stoddard Cancer Wing.) Warm someone's heart today. . . pass this along. I love this story so very much, I cry every time I read it. Just try to make a difference in someone's life today? tomorrow? Just "do it". Random acts of kindness, I think they call it?

"Believe in Angels, then return the favor."

Happiness Is Fleeting. True Joy Comes From Within.

We are happy when things go the way that we want them to, when we accomplish something, when we achieve a goal, when we win a game in a competition, or win a promotion. When things do not go the way that we want them to we are unhappy. When we do not get what we want and expect, we become disappointed and feel down.

Happiness is fleeting. It cannot be sustained, because it is dependent upon circumstances to change to what we want them to change to and once we get what we want, if we get what we want, happiness is felt and then it dies, because it has been fulfilled; so, in order to feel happiness again we must set another goal, which requires circumstances to change for the better, where we ultimately achieve our goal.

Our thoughts create happiness. Happiness is an emotion—a byproduct of our thinking. Happiness is not stationary. It is always moving. We’re happy one minute and then were unhappy the next. We may even achieve a goal and become happy, but during those feelings of happiness we may get unwelcomed news about something that upsets us and then we are no longer happy. Our focus on accomplishing and achieving the goal is now turned towards the problem that upset us.

Joy is naturally within us, regardless of what happens in our lives. There are no expectations for happiness, but a complete acceptance for All That Is, which includes when things go our way and when things do not go our way. We are ok, either way. Joy is experienced when the mental chatter of the mind is silenced and we are at peace. The mind covers up the natural joy that is inside of you, if you let it.

You must release all attachments—to other people, to material objects, to expectations, and to outcomes. This does not mean that you have to stop pursuing goals. You can have goals, just do not get attached to the outcome of those goals, expecting for them to make you happy. You will only get a temporary, fleeting feeling of happiness when you achieve a goal. Enjoy the process of pursuing a goal, instead of focusing on the outcome. The goal is easier to achieve when you enjoy each moment, the day-to-day process of taking action towards achieving the goal.

We tend to push happiness off as a destination to reach in the future, when we have joy available to us right in the here and now. All that is needed is to release all negative thoughts and perceptions that take us away from feeling our natural joy. The more at peace you are within, the more you will be able to experience true joy. Going within and being consciously aware of what you are thinking, on a regular basis, will help you to change your thoughts to more positive ones and to drop the ones that are of no use to you and that only bring you down. Life is a joy that is lived in each moment, where time is not a factor and there are no expectations.

LOVE BUILD ON SYMPATHY, IS NOTHING BUT A WEAK FOUNDATION.!

Don't force anyone to love you cause any love build on sympathy is a weak foundation. I'm glad that I don't fit in your fantasy world. I'm me, take me or not makes no difference bye..No matter what pain you've been through, tears will dry, broken hearts will heal, and somewhere out there the person who truly cares is waiting..A strong woman is one who gets her heart broken time and time again and still has the strength to gather the pieces to create a new life for herself. Remember that no matter what pain you have been through, tears will dry, broken hearts will heal, and somewhere out there the person who truly cares is waiting. you’re a woman and you are strong. Sometimes you meet certain people that can touch your soul in certain ways most people can’t. 
But you have to let them go because you realize that it just isn't the best time in your life for them to come. It seems like you meet the perfect people just when you can't handle them. I have all these feelings - these weird feelings, and I had this burning desire to express them. But I can’t. I just can’t. And these feelings - they’re trapped and they are like stuck in my heart. And I just feel so lonely. Do you know why people hate to admit they are lonely? 
It’s because when you do, everyone thinks that something is wrong with you. They think “I have people in my life, why don’t you?” But the strange thing is, you can have people in your life and still be alone. Because sometimes people do actually feel that way. Sometimes your life feels like it’s caving in on you. Sometimes people really do feel like they don’t want to exist, like they want to just curl up in a ball, and go into that place between life and death. 
Saying “I don’t want to exist” isn't saying “I want to go die”. It’s saying I wish that, for the time being, I could go somewhere and not have to feel. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. And if you don’t know how it feels to feel this way, then you have no place to judge anyone who does. I’m telling you, there’s nothing wrong with being lonely sometimes, it’s okay…you’ll be alright.! 

Job 10:1, My soul is weary of my life; I will leave my complaint upon myself; I will speak in the bitterness of my soul.